Shitty day? Friends!

Today was a shitty day.

I felt lonely. I felt down. I felt miserable. I felt demotivated. I felt angry. I felt sad. I felt annoyed. I wanted to hurt someone. I spent two hours writing text messages to myself to calm myself down.

Not. Nice. At. All.

And all of that because I got cold. And also because I made some wrong conclusions based on partial information and I was beating myself because of the maybes. I should know better by now.

Yeah… the cold.

Imagine you are barely moving after a knee surgery. You do everything right for almost three months. It goes according to plan. Then the doctor tells you - cool, you can do stationary bike, walking and swimming. No other sports allowed. I hate swimming.

You get to a forest for the first time. You love it! Such progress! Such wow! And then on the same day, you get a cold. You get a sore throat and a full nose. And you are back to where you were for the previous weeks. Stuck at home, too <something> to do something. That blows, man!

And it reminded me of the times when I felt depressed. I was never clinically diagnosed, but I was there. I’m pretty sure of that. You want to do something, but you just can’t. You know you need to talk to someone, but you don’t even know what to say. You just hope that somebody would show interest in you so you can tell them how miserable you feel.

And then I remembered… I have friends. I am also an adult. I can do things on my own. So I reached out to someone, I showed interest in them. And because my friends are decent human beings, they reciprocated.

I love my friends. Now let’s get a little high on flu meds.